Stop resisting, start redirecting

Happy Sunday.

Have you ever heard the idea that what you resist persists?

It's a cute little cliche packed with wisdom.

Because when you are resisting something, you're still actively thinking about it.

And our reality, as a general rule, springs forth from what we're thinking about and focusing our attention on.

(Going deeper into that, well... that's a topic for another day.)

So, assuming this is true...

This is a pretty friggin' important concept to understand.

Because if you're resisting something, it's because you don't want it to be part of your reality, and yet that very resistance ensures that it stays part of your reality.

And this is doubly true when it comes to quitting porn or any other addictive behavior.

Because the craving to use it grows when it's given attention.

And it withers without attention.

So let's use an example I'm super familiar with.

Most people will try to quit porn, and tell themselves repeatedly that they won't watch it, they won't do it, they'd like to but they just aren't going to, etc... or they'll think about how nice it would be, but how they can't... and the whole time, they're still thinking about porn on some level and thereby making sure that it remains alive in their mind and body.

The craving subtly grows over time.

For someone "quitting" this way, staying clean gets harder the longer they go.

And that's a real shame, because they're trying to remove it from their reality and really, it should be getting easier over time as the neural pathways associated with that behavior weaken... but it often just doesn't happen that way.

Part of how I've found freedom over the past 5 years...

I stopped thinking about it.

Started focusing on what I could do instead.

It literally never crosses my mind these days, except to the extent necessary to accomplish my work of helping other guys quit too.

So stop resisting it.

Start redirecting your energy.

And if you need help quitting for good because you've been trying and nothing is working out... what I've shared here is the tip of the iceberg. But I can walk you through the whole thing.